I took note of something fishy during a recent episode of CBS News’ Face the Nation, and it wasn’t the fact that I’d been watching with the television off and while in another room, as is typically the case. The guest for that day had been advertised as Dick Cheney, the key word being “advertised,” as while the individual ultimately interviewed may have paid some resemblance, it was certainly not him. Take a look at the photo below, and see if you can discern anything strange about it.
Why, it’s Roy Scheider, whose brief and unsuccessful career as a big screen action hero we somewhat ironically chronicled just a few days ago! So that’s what he’s been up to as of late. The bald cap and lackluster makeup job aren’t fooling anyone, Roy. Still, the question begs to be asked: Where’s the real Dick Cheney, and why has he left a second-rate actor to pose as vice president in his stead? I’m afraid this revelation unfortunately creates more controversy than it resolves.
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Poor Roy. This is probably his last chance to play a larger than life true action hero and even here he has failed. I can’t help feel sorry for the guy. Can we set up some kind of fund or something?
I heard that Dick was off making another movie. That was the official cover story, anyway.
Heather, talk about cruel irony for Roy. I hear he auditioned for that role as well. Unfortunately, while he was able to nail the lines infinitely better than Cheney and Van Damme, he was laughed off the stage in the midst of his martial arts demonstration.
Bill, I think the best thing we can do for poor Roy is to be careful not to step on the broken pieces of his shattered ego that tend to litter the ground wherever he goes.